"Volume XV2"

I wrote this blog and then completely hated it so instead of making this an official Volume, consider this the blog appetizer for the real Volume XV, which in reality is really no better than this brief snippet.


And now to this week's write up...

For the last two years I’ve been operating on only one car alarm clicker after my other one found its way out of my suitcase on a flight. I also needed some other items so I headed into the Toyota Dealership for a purchase. The convo went something like this :

Me : Yeah I need a clicker
Auto Parts Guy : ok let me bring that up, (typing, slow hunt & peck method) looks like … ooh (grimace), $150, well, ooh (more typing, grimace) ooh, let me try this, (more typing), ooh yeah, $150. (grimace)

Me : So… $150?
Auto Parts : Yeah $150, but then you need to have it programmed.
Me : Ok…
Auto Parts Guy :
Me : Ok…?
--- Awkward Silence, both of us just kind of stare ----
Me : Programming? (looking around for some sort of help, kind of like a Virgin at an Orgy)
Auto Parts : Oh we don’t do that here
Me : Really, not here huh? Should I just…uh…take a six week course on Transportation Engineering, I uh…(are you kidding?)
Auto Parts Guy : Oh, no I mean (more typing, more grimaces), we do it here, just not in parts, the guys in service can do it.
Me : And the charge will be ?
Auto Parts Guy : (more typing, grimace) Looks like about $150 for labor
Me : Jesus, well ok then. I also need a replacement taillight, some drunk guy smashed it in
Auto Parts Guy : (more typing) Let me see… Ouch, (grimace) Looks like $150
Me : $150? Is there anything in your system not $150? How much for a new engine?
Auto Parts Guy : (more typing) Lets see, carry the one, add six for pistons, well it looks like you’re looking at about…(typing) hmm, add that, subtract, ok got it…looks like…well about $150...

After making my way over to the service guy who witnessed this whole exchange he proceeded to look shockingly flustered when I informed him that I’d need my new clicker programmed. Finally he told me he could, but just not right that moment and that it would take him an hour because the service guy had gone home, but yet his shirt said Paul “Service Tech.”

I liked it a lot better in the heart of the recession when people actually wanted to work to make some money.

Til next time...

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